Friday, 28 June 2019

Suggestions and coping

Thank you for all the recent comments, commiserations and suggestions.  I'd like to answer a few of them here.

Husband has been taking antibiotics repeatedly, with just a few days off in between courses, for the past 8 weeks or so, he's on another course right now.  I don't suppose the anti-b's are doing his friendly gut bacteria much good, as they kill off everything indiscriminately.  I know live yogurt will help with that, but it won't be of much help whilst he's taking the meds almost continuously.

From everything that we've been told by the various doctors we've seen, and from what I've read during the vast amount of research I've done online, it does appear that it should get better in time - eventually, although it may (will) take weeks.  The recommended treatments are 1) painkillers, which he does now take regularly, although says they don't work.  He is also (because of his heart condition) only allowed to take paracetamol and codeine, along with the ghastly orange drink to counteract the codeine constipation.  2)  Antibiotics if infection is present (see previous paragraph).  3)  Alpha-blocker meds, which the hospital prescribed him, he's been taking 2 different types of these for the past 9 or 10 days, they could take weeks to work though.

Some of you suggested cranberry juice drinks - he's been drinking this every day for a few weeks now....doesn't seem to have helped, other than keeping him hydrated.

He's also got the pee bottle and pads I bought him (which he has started to use, albeit reluctantly), and has a medically approved cushion to sit on, which the elderly neighbour whose husband died has lent him.

So he's doing everything that has been suggested or prescribed, and so far nothing has helped significantly.  Let's hope it does sooner rather than later.

We sleep in separate rooms about every other night now, so both of us get more chance to sleep.  It's not something we want to do permanently though - my opinion is what's the point of being married if you're going to have separate bedrooms?  I'm not passing judgement on anybody else - that's just MY opinion.

We all have our own ways of coping with might seem at times as though I don't cope at all well and do a lot of complaining on  here - well as it happens, that is one of my coping mechanisms.  If I don't get things off my chest, then I just brood about it and get very depressed and introspective.  It's my blog, I can say what I like, if people don't want to read my moans (and I can understand that) - well, nobody is forcing you to read (yes I mean you, VH!!).  

I do want so much to go and see my mum, but it's out of the question right now - husband is unable to drive for that distance and length of time, and I don't feel able or willing to leave him for that long either.  I could go with my brother, he has said he's more than willing to take me, but I'm not going until husband is better.  I have spoken to my mother (who is very happy to be home and feels so much better for it) and she understands perfectly and has in fact insisted that I not make any attempt to go up there until he is better.

I am doing something selfish tomorrow - I'm going to a bbq party, on my own, something i've never done before.  Husband doesn't feel well enough to go, it's at a neighbour's house so I will be nearby and will have my phone with me in case he needs me.  I need some time for myself and husband is happy for me to go alone.  As I don't drive and there's no public transport here, this is about my only opportunity (other than dog walking in the nearby field, which is a bit of a problem with my poorly hip but I still do it) to get out by myself.  Something I feel sorely in need of right now.  I haven't had any offers to take me out anywhere, people always think of the unwell person, understandably so, but it's hard for carers too.

Lovely day, I'm glad there's quite a strong breeze though or it would be too hot for me.  I'm just off into the garden to pick a load of lavender heads for pot pourri.


  1. I can’t stand the over orange taste of Fybogel. The active ingredient is psyllium husk which you can buy on its own, usually online. It is tasteless and you can mix it in better tasting squashes yourself.

    1. It's something called Laxido he's got on prescription - I guess it's much the same thing. It's not so much the taste he doesn't like, it's the texture - he says it's like drinking wallpaper paste.

  2. I totally unerstand about the coping strategies and I'm glad you have this outlet and that it helps.
    I'm pleased your Mum is home and that she is understanding and urging you not to try to get to see her.
    Have a lovely time at the party.

  3. Good to hear your mum is home - always the best place I reckon.
    Enjoy that BBQ

  4. This sure has become a nightmare for you. I am praying for you. I certainly hope the meds work sooner than later. So happy for you to be able to get out for a bit. I too am prone to UTIs. I was drinking gallons of cranberry juice till I found out two things. The cranberry juice has to have no sugar in it as the sugar enables the bad bacteria to grow. The second I happened on by chance. I take two cranberry capsules a day and have not had one in a long while. I apologize if I am overstepping my bounds by adding my two cents worth. Love and hugs to you both.

  5. Hello and welcome. Husband's cranberry juice is a no added sugar one...I didn't know about the cranberry capsules, will look out for them, thank you.

  6. Hi Sooze, glad to hear your mom is doing well and that you get to go to the bbq for a little break. Have you asked the doctor about DH taking probiotics while he is taking so many antibiotics. They are supposed to be wonderful for the gut bacteria.

  7. First you need to get out for yourself and if your husband is happy that you have some fun, all the better. Don't know if you saw my post a few days ago but would your doctor suggest the laser surgery for your husband or does his health stop any plans that way? He must be so uncomfortable, glad the infection is gone though.

  8. Hope you enjoy the barbecue. It's not selfish. It is essential to have some time out.


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