Once we got home yesterday (to sunshine, albeit a little chilly), I unpacked everything and put it away and loaded the washing machine ready for going on first thing this morning. Husband watered the garden, then relaxed (driving does take it out of him). I then wrote a shopping list for today, a top up shop for dairy and fruit/veg.
Husband's decided to take our home Freesat box the next time we go back to the caravan, to see if that works the TV ok.....if it does, he'll leave it there and buy a new one for home. If it doesn't - well, that's his problem to sort out.
I know this is yet another symptom of husband's cognitive impairment, he often gets obsessions - he'll get a bee in his bonnet about something, or something will go wrong, and it consumes him totally, he goes on and on about it for days, it's all he can think or talk about. He can't help it, I know, but it requires massive amounts of patience from me. Sometimes it takes more than I can give, which is what happened at the caravan park.....we'd gone there to help our friends pack up their belongings and say goodbye, and then intended to do the garden and relax - not much relaxation to be had when husband's in the grip of his latest obsession. At least at home it's easier to deal with - we have space, for one thing. Knowing what causes his obsessive behaviour and that he can't help it is all very well, but actually living with it and trying to deal with it/contain his obsessiveness is not easy.
Anyway, we're home now and back to normal routines. After putting washing on the line then going shopping I've got menu plans to write, banking to do and a few more garden plans to make. One of my new cottage garden plants has died whilst we've been away, so will get another one (a lupin) to replace it, we also need to buy a couple of butternut squash plants, and I have some pelargoniums to plant up into a couple of pots.
Hi Sooze - I don't get to comment often now but Just wanted to say I know exactly how you feel about the obsessions - my mum, who is now 98 and has similar impairments and problems as your husband, can get on top of me from time to time. Between visits (she is 90 miles away) I ring her every evening at about 6pm and she goes over and over what the latest problem is and can't let it drop for days until something else takes over. Often it is a carer who has upset her especially if the agency send a man. Just after Christmas it was the TV remote that she couldn't get on with so we bought her a large button version. It can be anything that upsets her even programs on the TV as two weeks ago she watched the latest new Midsomer Murders episode but for some reason didn't like it and thought it wasn't the same as the older versions. I watched it and it was pretty normal the only difference being that the actors are older and Betty did not appear. But now she can't let it drop and to add weight to her complaint she now tells me everyone in her apartment complex is complaining about it (she never sees any of the other residents now as they can't cope with her obsessions) and more recently hundreds of people have complained about it and they won't be making any more!
ReplyDeleteEach evening over the phone I go through the TV guide for the 7 and 8pm slot on Freeview 10 and 20. She is easily confused over The Last of the Summer Wine and Midsomer Murders because of the summer in the title and she likes to watch both of these programs - one is on 10 and the other 20 and we go over and over about ten times which one is on which channel. She is now calling it the Last of the Summer Murders so I never know which one she really wants to watch. By the end of our phone call I am exhausted. It is such a hard and frustrating condition for anyone to live with (for both parties) and all I can say is I admire how you cope and reading your blog helps me to cope a little better with my mum. Take care.
I think your Mum and my Mum are in cahoots, I am going through exactly the same thing at the moment. This weeks obsession is that Betty the hairdresser is doing the cleaning for her, she's not and hasn't for a long time but we had her list of jobs about six times yesterday.
DeleteKnowing the cause of your husband's obsessions doesn't help when you're in the grip of it all, does it? At least at home, you can get away from him for a while. I've tried growing lupins, which I love, but mine just become slug and snail food! I don't like using slug pellets, so I'll have to make do with other, not so tasty, plants! xx
ReplyDeleteWell at least you had a nice few days away, sunny here today so hope you're sharing it.
ReplyDeleteAs soon as I read about your Lupin that died, I wanted to warn you that any replacement would immediately be scoffed by snails or slugs. But I see that Happy Hooker has already written the about the same problem. Hopefully you can find a replacement plant that won't attract those slimy pests!
ReplyDeleteJust wanted to add - if you have some fine grit, surround 'snail food' plants with a good thick layer. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteIt's really hard to deal with someone's obsession isn't it, and once they've gotten over one another one comes along, to drive you mad all over again. I'm glad you got time to spend with your friends before they left for good, even if the time away didn't go exactly to plan.
ReplyDeleteThe "hyper-focus" symptons can drive you just nuts, can't they! You have my sympathy...
ReplyDeleteI often hyper focus on something, I wonder how Harvey feels about that. Must ask him. I don't do it often, but once in awhile I just can't get something out of my head. I think I better work on that.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.