Tuesday 3 May 2022

Bloody hell!!

 Today is really turning out to be one of those days......I've been feeling increasingly stressed and anxious since the weekend, but today has finished me off.  

Betty has just emptied her anal sacs on my bed again (she did it for the first time last year sometime).  I know she can't help it, bless her, it's not her fault, and if I choose to allow her on my bed then it's a risk I have to take.  But obviously it's meant that I've had to strip my bed off completely and put it all in the if I haven't got enough to do today, or the next few days.  Right now I'm abandoning everything I have to do.....sod it, it'll all still be there tomorrow, I'll get an early start in the morning.

Nothing gets done in my house or garden unless I do it myself, or I organise all of it, or I specifically ask (several times usually) for it to be done.  

And just lately my nearest and dearest have been less than sympathetic or helpful or understanding of my depression - it's almost like they don't believe me or take in what I say when I try to explain how I'm feeling and how it affects my life and my reactions.  Funny that, when they bend over backwards to help others.  And when they're family/friends who KNOW me intimately and have done for many years!

Well, I'm not explaining anymore. in fact I'm not going to interact with anyone, apart from what's necessary.  I could do with some time alone, but that's not possible right now.....husband has a hospital appointment for tests on Thursday, which will be uncomfortable for him, and again on Saturday at a different hospital for more tests which he's had before and he'll be in quite a lot of discomfort for a few days after, so he'll need me to take care of him.  We'll be away at the caravan, he'll be going to hospital on his own (hospital rules), so at least I'll have a few hours by myself - well, with Betty.  And now her anal sacs are empty she'll be no trouble!

I'm turning off comments for this's just to get things off my chest, that's all.  I know you're all lovely kind people, and I thank you, but I don't really want any comments just now (and to those of you who think I'm just a whining old moaner who should stop being so self absorbed and pull herself together and get on with life - bog off!  I didn't ask for your opinion, and you don't walk in my shoes).

Sorry if I don't post for a while, I expect things will simmer down sooner or later.