My day off!

Morning all, thank you for comments and welcome to new followers.  

Betty had her grooming session yesterday and is all soft and smelling lovely now....until she goes out for her walk this morning in the rain and mud!  Ah well, that's life lol.

We used to take her to the large national chain pet store in town for grooming, they're very good with her and she likes it there....but it costs £28.  We discovered just a few weeks ago (how did we not know this before?!) that the agricultural college just down the road from us have dog grooming classes, the public can take their dogs there as the students need dogs to practise on, under the watchful guidance of  the instructor.  We took Betty there last month for a 'meet and greet' on the advice of the instructor - Betty was fine (she would be anyway, seeing as she loves meeting new people) and I was very happy with the lovely lady instructor and the facilities - the instructor even clipped Betty's claws whilst we were there and refused payment!  For a full grooming service - thorough brush to get rid of all loose hair, bath and blow dry, ear cleaning, nail clipping, walk on lead for a wee in a fully fenced area, they charge just £10.  Betty loved it, they loved her, so that's where we're taking her in future.  She really doesn't like us bathing her, she gets stressed and we and the bathroom get absolutely soaked, so £10 is a small price to pay (a damn sight smaller than £28!) for her and our peace of mind.

I have a list of jobs to do today - but they're things I WANT to do, not things I HAVE to do, so I'm looking forward to doing them.  It includes putting the decorations up....as I only decorate the hall window though, it won't take long!  I have the ends to sew in on my new crochet blanket....I'm doing the sensible thing this time and sewing in ends after each half a dozen rows, rather than leaving it all to the end and being faced with masses and masses of them.  I'm really enjoying doing this new blanket - I bought Lucy of Attic24's new Sweetpea CAL pack, using some saved birthday money - the CAL (crochet-a-long) isn't due to start until January, but I wanted to start now, doing my own usual small cluster stitch but following the colour stripe scheme she showed on her blog post.  The colours are beautiful, just my sort of thing, and will go perfectly in our bedroom.  I also want to have a go at making pikelets (sort of flat crumpets, yeasted breakfast or Sunday tea type things, for my readers across the pond) - think I made them once years and years ago, possibly at school but never since.  Other than that, I'll just be watching a couple of things we've recorded but not yet got round to viewing.

Have a good day all.

Should have gone to Specsavers! (oh, he did)

Wow, thank you all so much for your comments, including from lots of new readers, following my soapbox moment yesterday.  I've always stood up for myself over the years - except when I thought it wasn't worth my time - but now even more so.  It's like a switch has been flicked inside me and I've become much more decisive and assertive.

Yesterday morning we went out early to go to husband's optician appointment.  We got nearly to the end of our lane, when he suddenly decided he needed the loo and reversed back at speed (about 100 yards).  Through sheer carelessness (bearing in mind he's been a professional HGV driver all his life), he bashed the side of the car into our neighbour's stone wall, smashing the wing mirror and indicator light underneath it to bits, breaking the reflector light the neighbour has on their wall (for safety reasons!) and scaring me half to death.  (and as I said, we were on our way to town to his EYE TEST appointment!!).

After I'd recovered from the shock (and the desire to whack him round the head with all the bits of wing mirror he'd left me to pick up whilst he dashed indoors), I thought - well, I can either be right moody and let it spoil my day, or I can just put it out of my mind, place it all firmly on his shoulders and leave him to deal with it all entirely by himself.  So that's what I did, telling him it was up to him to sort out (including how to pay for it) and I didn't want to know.  I know it was an accident, I'm not dwelling on it, hopefully that's the 3rd thing to do with the car out of the way now and there won't be anything else!  

I left him in the opticians and went off for a mooch around town by myself, something I almost never get the chance to do.  It was good, I hardly spent anything, only buying some paracetamol and dog treats and a little Christmas decoration for £1 in a charity shop, it was just nice to have a look round on my own.  

Incidentally, his eyesight has hardly changed, he doesn't need new glasses (!!) and his hearing is also fine.  So it's just selective hearing then, as is normal for men ;-).

Out early again this morning to take Betty to the groomers, then housework to do for the rest of the day, along with spicing up and reboiling the boring chutney I talked about the other day.  I want to get everything done so I can have the day free on Friday - I'm going to have a day doing absolutely bugger all!

The reality of being poor!

There's something I need to point out, as some people don't seem to have grasped it:-

This is a frugal blog, we live a frugal and thrifty lifestyle - because we have to!  Husband is retired and gets State pension, Pension credit, Housing benefit and 3 small (very small) private pensions.  I am not yet retirement age, having 7 or 8 years to go yet (at least) before I am entitled to State pension....in view of the fact that the Government keep moving the goalposts, I may never get there! (don't get me started on that!).  I do get a private pension, also very small.  Because I am not of retirement age and not disabled, I am not eligible for any benefits.  I do, however, get free prescriptions (because of my diabetes) and free dental treatment - husband's Pension credit covers me for that (just as well in view of the amount of (ongoing) dental treatment I've had this year).  The Housing Benefit does not cover our total rent, they only pay what our family circumstances entitle us to, which is a 1 bedroom flat - as we have a 3 bedroom house our rent is dearer, so we have to pay the balance.

That's the sum total of our joint income.  We don't own our home, for reasons I'm not going into as it's nobody else's business, we rent privately.  If we did own our home, we would have paid off our mortgage by now, having bought our first home about 34 years ago, whereas renting means we have to pay ad infinitum, and are also continually at the mercy of our Landlord.  But that's life.

We did have savings put aside for car repairs and emergencies - the 2 breakdowns we had recently, costing around £1000, wiped out those savings completely.  We have no arrears and all bills are paid by direct debit, we don't lead a frivolous lifestyle, far from it, we don't belong to any golf or gardening or social clubs or anything that costs membership - we're not on the breadline but have very little spare cash.  Particularly since we now have to try to put money aside to build up our emergency fund again - if we had another car breakdown anytime soon, I have no idea what we'd do.  We almost never go out for meals, we never go to the cinema or the pub or to events or places that cost money - we cannot afford it.  We only buy 'stuff' if it's necessary - and we look for either second hand or a very good sale price.  We shop at Aldi, Lidl, Morrisons and Asda - because that's what we can afford.  We used to buy our meat in bulk 2 or 3 times a year from a local butcher - haven't done for over a year, we just can't afford it now.

So, as I said, we live a very thrifty lifestyle, because we bloody well have no other choice!  I'm not complaining, we love our life.  But it would be nice to be spontaneous sometimes and go out for a meal, or buy something nice for the house that we see in a shop, or not have to take a flask of coffee and a sandwich every time we go out for a day but buy lunch in a café instead.  We hardly ever go for days out now anyhow, not just because of the weather but also because of the cost of fuel.  We've turned down 2 Christmas evening out invitations because we couldn't afford the ticket prices.  It does get a bit demoralising sometimes, but we shake it off and have a coffee and bit of homemade cake.

But some people just don't seem to get it.  We don't shop in Waitrose or M&S Foodhall, we don't have fresh flowers every week, we don't buy meat from butchers or classy farm shops, we don't buy new clothes or shoes (unless we have a lucky find in a charity shop, or an excellent bargain in a sale).  We don't do any of that because we can't afford to!  If we do buy something (like my new winter coat), then we have to go without something else.

If we go on holiday, it's the cheapest we can find, usually a budget caravan or chalet lodge, and we have to save all year for that.  And we can't go any great distance because of the cost of fuel.  We go to the Midlands once a year and stay in a budget caravan on a nice site for a few days, just so we can visit our family....because we're respectful and take good care of the owner's caravan and leave it in a clean and tidy state, he lets us have a discount, otherwise we couldn't afford that.  We count ourselves very lucky if we are able to afford to go on holiday, even in a budget caravan.

This is a blog about our frugal, thrifty (cheap, if you want to say it without frills) lifestyle - it is what it is, it's our life.  I read lots of other frugal, thrifty blogs, because they're on my wavelength, they get it, they're non-judgemental.  But there are people who, for some odd reason, read mine and other thrifty blogs when they have no need to lead the kind of budget life we do - it's obvious from some of their comments that they're not short of a bob or two, so I don't quite see what the attraction is.  Perhaps they just like to show off?!  Or perhaps they're so wrapped up in their own luxurious comfortable free-spending bubble that they simply cannot comprehend someone else's reality of not being able to afford what are luxuries to us, but everyday items to them.

I'm sorry to be so blunt, but I think it needed saying - this is our life, our life is not your life, we can't afford the things you do, we're poor but (reasonably, given the year we've had) happy!

Not a whinge...more of a slight disgruntlement ;-)

Hello all, thank you for comments again and welcome to some new followers.  Seems more people are finding me now, since I gave up trying to make my blog private.  Not that I mind - I've got over trying to 'discourage' some people reading - if they insist on going to the trouble of finding me and reading, well then they can't get irritated if they read something they don't like.  Nobody is forcing them to read, after all.  Having been an emotional wreck for most of this year, I feel a lot stronger now...harder, even, and less likely to put up with things or people that upset me. 

I shall be glad when husband's had his eye test tomorrow and gets new glasses ordered - if indeed he needs stronger ones, which I'm fairly sure he will.  I know this is partly a man thing - he can't see what's right at the end of his nose, unless I point it out to him.  A perfect example - the other day in the supermarket I'd sent him off to get a box of 15 eggs.  He was gone quite a time, I found him in the egg aisle, standing in front of them, seemingly clueless.  3 times I pointed to the 15 eggs boxes and said 'there they are', each time he said 'where?'.  The final time I did say 'THERE!!' quite loudly and a woman pushing her trolley past at the time laughed and said 'I feel your pain!'.

He is terrible at washing up, he's got a lot worse lately, I have to re-wash more and more things he's supposedly already washed as they still have food or coffee stains on.  And he never washes the outside, bottoms or backs of anything!  I know some will say I should be grateful that he washes up at all, and I am - mostly.  But it's not much help if I have to re-wash half of what he's done, is it?  I've told him he should wear his glasses and he says he does...trouble is, it's usually his distance glasses he's wearing as he likes to gaze out of the window over the field rather than looking at what he's doing.  So, as I say, I'm fairly sure he needs new glasses!

It's our lovely neighbour friend's birthday tomorrow (she's a month younger than me), I'm just about to make her a bread pudding.  Not a traditional birthday cake, I know!  But she really likes bread pudding, it's one of her favourites.  

No we didn't go mad!! And some great news

Thank you for all the congratulations, I'm still on a high from losing that weight, we'll definitely be having a 3 day diet stint every week or 2.  I don't mind being very strict for 3 days, it'll help us to continue losing weight without getting bored and giving up altogether.  

On Saturday for dinner we had a 1/4 pounder burger each, shop bought frozen ones, which I topped with blue cheese, with oven chips and an olive ciabatta roll spread with Bertolli and mayo, to stuff the chips in.  Oh and coleslaw on the side as a token bit of veg.  The chip butty was lovely, the burger was just alright - but it kept repeating on me and gave me indigestion all night.  Think I'll stick to making my own in future.  Sunday's dinner was lean minced beef with loads of chopped veggies in, served on horseradish mash, lovely.  Other than the chip butty, oh and a packet of crisps whilst watching Strictly Saturday night (fantastic, by the way - both Strictly and the crisps!), we didn't go overboard foodwise at all really.

Out to town this morning, to pick up something on order.  No, not a Christmas gift, something practical.  We like soft lighting in our lounge in the evenings, one fairly dim floor lamp behind husband's armchair, a small lamp on the desk and a large glass jar on the mantel filled with fairy lights.  It's all very restful and easy on the eyes....trouble is, I can't see to read or crochet, the lighting is just too dim.  So I'm getting a floor lamp to stand beside my chair, it's called a Father and Child lamp, an uplighter with a small adjustable reading lamp lower down the stand, should be just right for me to see by in the evenings, each light has an independent switch so I don't have to have both on if not needed.

Some good news (for a change!) - my mother was undergoing tests for a gastric problem, the possibility of stomach cancer had cropped up.  The tests showed no sign of cancer, she has a hiatus hernia.  Not very nice for her, of course, but what a relief it's nothing more serious.  She's been told to eat small meals, little and often, and nothing too spicy (she doesn't like spicy anyway).  She already takes medication to protect her stomach from the side effects of her aspirin.

Husband's got the dentist today, eye and hearing tests Wednesday.  Betty's going to the groomers on Thursday for a bath and nail clip.  I shall be doing some baking this week (I missed that last week), and have some chutney to try and pep up.  I made a batch of fruity chutney back in the Spring, 6 jars....it's ok but nothing special, not spicy enough and not up to my usual standard.  4 unopened jars of it have been sat in the cupboard ever since, we had 1 jar a few months back, didn't have another for a while as we weren't keen.  I opened another jar a couple of weeks ago, thinking it might have matured and got better with age - nope, still boring.  So I'm going to put it all back in the pan, add some more spices and a couple of chillies, bit of brown sugar and vinegar and reboil.  Hopefully that'll bring it up to scratch, I certainly don't want to chuck it away.

Life quotes

The weigh in

Weigh in this morning after our first short term strict diet....I'm really pleased to report I've lost 6 and a half pounds - in just 5 days!  Husband has lost 4 pounds, but then he's got a lot less to lose than me.  I know it's mostly water (I've been peeing for England this week, although that's partly due to my new diabetes meds) but, even so, it's a huge boost to my mood.

I feel a lot less bloated, my stomach is noticeably smaller (wish I'd thought to measure my waist at the start) and my face is much less puffy.  I also feel much better already.  It's all so encouraging, and we've decided we'll do the same thing for 3 days at a time, probably every other week.  We'll eat normally (but try to be more sensible and not go mad on carbs or portion sizes) for the coming week, then have another go at the diet the week after.  

Brenda asked what a chip butty is - sorry, I forget that some of my readers are abroad!  It's classic comfort food, not particularly healthy.  It's chips (you probably call them fries) between two slices of buttered bread, a chip sandwich if you will.  But they have to be big fat chips, not those skinny ones you get in McD's!  Sauce, be it tomato or brown or mayo, is optional and down to personal taste.  Hope that helps, Brenda - do you have anything similar?

As if we haven't had enough eggs this week, I really fancy an omelette this morning, with bacon and lots of CHEESE!!  I've just had my first frothy cappuccino of the day.....so delicious.