Thank you for comments, it's all a lot to consider. Another complication is that our rent here is relatively cheap, it wouldn't be nearer to a town and amenities.
Anyway, that'll all have to be put aside till sometime in the future. Husband had his appointment yesterday with the consultant, the one where he was told to take a relative with him. I can see why - there's a lot to think about.....no cancer, but plenty of complicated other stuff.
To cut a long story short, he needs an operation, and there are 3 options for this op. One is fairly new and they haven't done many of them as yet, so a bit experimental. He can choose which of the other two options he wants to go for, each have their advantages and disadvantages. However, for various reasons, he may not be able to have the op at our local hospital - well, I say local, it takes nearly an hour to get there, despite being only 14 miles away as the crow flies...the trouble is, it's a bit of a convoluted route (another downside of living in a rural area). He may have to go to either Reading (120 miles away) or Newport, Wales (65 miles). How he's supposed to get to either place and then home again, I don't know....he might be entitled to hospital transport, I know nothing about that, will have to look into it I suppose. Whichever it is, he'll need to be in for 2 or 3 nights and I won't be able to visit him.
He needs (yet another) test first before anything else happens, so another period of waiting.
Why is everything so complicated? And everything always seems worse when it's the early hours of the morning and you can't sleep.
I've phoned the hospital patient transport advisory number. They won't transport husband, as he's not eligible - he's not disabled, has no medical need and is able to walk. And as the transport is free of charge, they have a distance limit, unless there are very special circumstances. They mentioned community schemes whereupon a volunteer driver takes people in the driver's own vehicle or a minibus - the customer has to pay, it's not cheap (£11, with a bus pass which husband hasn't got, to go to our local hospital, so I dread to think what it would cost to go 120 miles) and again they won't all go beyond a certain distance. Their only other suggestion was to ask the consultant if there's a surgeon willing to do it in a hospital not as far away. Which I assume the consultant would have suggested anyway! Ah well, it might not happen, so we'll just have to cross that bridge if we come to it.