Tuesday 1 November 2022

Grumbling again - me that is

 Yesterday husband cooked some liver for Betty, I asked him to do it as I was busy and he wasn't doing anything, he got on with it without grumbling.  Later on though, I found bloody smears and fingerprints everywhere - on the fridge door and inside the fridge, on worktops and a clear fingerprint on a cupboard door.  He'd cut up the liver and fried it in a big frying pan - he always does any kind of frying on a high heat, so the entire hob, the worktops either side and the floor in front of the cooker were liberally splattered with fat.  None of which was wiped clean.  He's like this every time he does anything in the kitchen - mess left everywhere.  He'd washed up after lunch - when I was putting the drained dishes away later, I found a (washed up) glass with a lump of food inside it (it was a glass, it was clearly visible!) and bits of food left on cutlery and plates.  His answer is invariably "I didn't have my glasses on, what do you expect?" (- well put your bloody glasses on then!!).  Which was also his answer when I asked him to come and clean up all the mess from frying the liver.  It's not that he does all this deliberately, as a sneaky way of getting out of being asked to do it in the future - he's just so slapdash and genuinely doesn't look properly at what he's doing.

And I guess this is why in the past I've just got on and done everything myself - it's easier and at least I know it gets done properly then!

Family problems are ongoing, I haven't got the strength or will to try and sort things out.  The problematical family member is currently on another spurt of sending literally dozens of stupid irritating texts on his current daily 'problems' - which are nothing of the sort, they're just ridiculous petty nonsense which his OCD and paranoia blows up out of all proportion.  So I've blocked him again.  He's had plenty of professional help offered in the past, which he's declined (very rudely swearing at them) every time, and frequently stops taking his medication, so as far as I'm concerned, his problems are of his own making, if he declines help then he's made his bed, he's got to lie in it.

Betty woke me up in the early hours - it was extremely windy, I expect she could hear things being blown around the garden.  Also, I could hear a dog somewhere nearby, it was barking continually and seemed to be in distress, I suspect it was one of the farm dogs.  There's a pheasant farm down the end of our lane, they have a couple of working spaniels who are kept outside I think, it must have been one of them.  Betty could obviously hear it too, and was running up and downstairs in between the front door and my bed, woofing, the sort of woof she does when she's on 'alert, protect family and territory' mode.  She obviously wanted me to get up, put my dressing gown and slippers on, go downstairs and let her out to check the boundaries for intruders, but I wasn't doing that.  I called her to come and get on the bed, which she reluctantly did, I calmed her down and she eventually went to sleep.....I wish I could get back to sleep as quickly and effortlessly as she does!


  1. Aaaaarrrggghhhhh!!! He would drive me MAAAAD! Did he clean it up properly? (I bet you went over it again.) And a disturbed night on top of everything else. I'm so glad I live alone; any mess is mine, all mine and so is the clearing up, but at least I can just get on with things. Hope you have a resful day today and a good night's sleep. x

  2. This is where living next door to my husband comes in very handy. I can turn a blind eye to any mess that he's made, and he is solely responsible for clearing it up. Meanwhile next door I can make my own mess ... if I want to! ;-)

  3. Why won't men wear their glasses? When my husband is trying to read something and asks "What does this say?" I reply, "It says put your bloody glasses on!" And why can't men see the mess on the cooker/worktop when they've done any cooking? As for the family problems, it's no longer your job to sort them out. You've got enough on your plate. They are all grown up and responsible for themselves. I've often wished I had an animal's knack of falling asleep almost instantly. I guess they don't have a million thoughts running through their heads! xx

  4. Do you read Weaver of Grass blog…I am worried about the writer…don’t you ever dare quit writing without telling us why…

  5. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr - men!!!! xx

  6. My husband does the same thing, after almost 46 years of marriage I am almost used to having to clean up his kitchen messes.

    God bless.

  7. I'd be tempted to tell my husband that I couldn't cook/work in such a mess and only put cold food on the table until the mess got cleared up. But I would be helpful and find his glasses for him.


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