I've decided that when I have a bad day (by that I mean mainly when I've had a bad day emotionally, for whatever reason), I won't be writing a blog post that day (so expect lots of gaps!!). The bad days happen, quite a lot at the moment, but I don't want to focus on the negativity. I'm getting zero help or understanding from those close to me right now, so I'm not going to ask, I'm building a buffer around myself and getting on with things alone. I'm the only person I can rely on, I know that now.
Yesterday was a bad one, very bad actually, for several reasons. But that was yesterday. I slept remarkably well last night, considering just how awful I felt yesterday - having enough sleep instantly makes me feel better.
There's increasing talk of a possible national lockdown coming again...well, I've been more or less in lockdown for weeks now so it won't make much difference to me.
However, the worsening Covid situation has thrown the tentative plans I'd made out of the window. The worst thing of all is that I'd planned on going away for a week following my week's recuperation from my op - well I can't do that now. That's a real blow, I desperately need that week away and was counting on it to get my head together and get perspective on things from a distance. Well, I can't go and that's that, I'll just have to muddle through until I can go. I am beginning to formulate other plans in my head, nothing can be set in stone though until the covid situation eases.
I know this blog post won't make a lot of sense to anyone else...sorry about that, but it helps to make things clearer to me, which is the point of me writing a blog - I write it for me.
I'm going to be busy today, I'll write about it tomorrow (unless it turns out to be another bad day!) 😉