It's one of those 'can't be arsed to do anything' days. For 2 pins I'd wrap up and take myself off for a day out somewhere on my own, but that's an impossibility. And before anyone thinks of saying just make a flask and go out for a walk....don't, it's just not feasible here, certainly not in winter. We live in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by farmers' fields, the lanes are very narrow and very muddy, with NO pavements (literally none), and the fields are so muddy and waterlogged you're up to your ankles or even calves in mud. I can't go anywhere unless I ask someone to take me, which I really can't do - having had to ask people several times recently to take me to GP or hospital appointments, and 2 appointments for the dog, I'm fed up with having to ask, it's embarrassing enough when it's a necessary appointment. And one friend said the other day their spouse had raised eyebrows when they said they were taking me to an appointment, so I'm clearly making a nuisance of myself.
I'm just so bloody fed up of being imprisoned indoors, other than the twice daily dog walks, which aren't exactly thrilling for either Betty or myself, given that we can only walk the narrow lanes or a quagmire of a field. And fed up with being taken for granted. And just plain downright sodding bored to tears - there's only so much housework or cooking I can (or am willing!) to do. As for crafting, e.g. making Christmas cards.....I'm just not in the mood for it, Christmas can bugger right off this year as far as I'm concerned.
Husband was very rude about the dinner I cooked yesterday - he didn't like it, fair enough, I wasn't forcing him to eat it, but he could have just said 'sorry darling, it's not to my taste but thank you for the effort you made' instead of being tactless and insulting. I'd leave him to do the cooking if it wasn't for the fact that he has no imagination and I'd have to spend so much time constantly telling him what to do (because everything I tell him just goes in one ear and straight out the other), it's just easier to do it myself. He's dyslexic so can't follow a recipe.
I'll be fine tomorrow I expect....tomorrow is another day (well not another one like today I bloody hope!!)
If anyone says 'think yourself lucky ' or 'count your blessings ' though, I shall probably scream - you have been warned!
I find wallowing in a 'can't be arsed day' when the mood takes me is always better than trying to fight it. Give your hubby a kick up the arse from me xxx
ReplyDeleteI am I am not going to say anything but I think more.
ReplyDeleteI would say I think you need to look carefully where you live, I know when I moved from a big town and buses every few minutes I made sure at least I had a bus once a day (be it for only 2 hours journeys but I could go every day if I wanted to.
I am so pleased at least you had a good talk to the doctor.
Well the sun is out now so I am of to feed the birds in the garden and then do my C,cards.
Hazel c uk 🌈🌈
I am in a similar situation. I live in a very remote area and I can't drive. It can be very difficult. I understand how fed up you must be, I hope things improve for you very soon.
ReplyDelete2020 can’t be over quick enough
ReplyDeleteHope tomorrow is a better day for you. And you can swear and scream as much as you like, there's a few of us out here who'll be happy to join you. xx
ReplyDeleteI usually find when I have a day like that (and there are many) that the next day I feel okay. Fingers crossed that it will be like that for you.
ReplyDeleteStill, it's good to get it all out on the blog, go on Sooze, let it all go. lol
Briony
x
I would be online searching for my new place to live...even if only in my dreams.
ReplyDeleteSorry this has brought you so shockingly to terms with how it would be without driving at all or a driver in the house.
Make plans is the only help I can give , since by the time I got there you may have come to blows.:) Me , myself and I ...just thinking out loud would probably go up to the spare room and go back to bed. I'll move over if you want to join me.
I know making you grin may not help, but I just don't know what to do for you. Scream and shout, kick his butt outside. He has a coat, he can sit on the patio outside for a bit...he needs it as well.
Email we can try to come to another answer, if you feel like it.
I am willing to help you search for a new place. I think you are overwhelmed with all the worry about, just too many things. Worry about you and not everyone else, they can take care of themselves...really, they can. Hugs . No, I am not letting go of you come back here and finish this hug.
Was it really necessary for your friend to tell you that there were raised eyebrows from their spouse when you were in need of a lift? Not kind. Winter isn't forever and it sounds as if in summer it is idylic where you live. It has been a bloody year, all in all - trapped inside with one's partner 24/7 is not conducive to harmony. A simple question from him indoors such as "what are we having to eat tonight?" is enough to send me searching out the carving knife.
ReplyDeleteHope you have a better day today, Sooze xx
ReplyDeleteAre you far from your local town? Is there a voluntary driver scheme you could use. I think the neighbour is trying to tell you they are not happy running you around which is sad really as they might need your help at some point.
ReplyDeleteI know you like living where you are but you do need to be at least a bus stop away from services as you must realise.
Yes we may be stating the obvious but as we age these things become important.
Its a shame that you cant have lessons to drive an automatic as they are so easy. Take care x
I agree with Julia, not much of a friend to repeat that to you though maybe it was a negative comment on her husband rather than reflecting her feelings. Maybe it is time to think about transport in the winter months. While my fantasy home would have been on a remote Hebridean beach practicality made sure that we moved to a place where we could function without a car. All the basics, shop, pub, doctor, pharmacy, beach and bus stop in walking distance. Hourly buses to everything else in Aber. I gave up cooking for my husband years ago. Three meals a day for twenty years for the family was quite enough for me. Even though now we do eat together we have different tastes, mostly salads for me and he cooks up more complicated meaty meals generally enough for several meals at a time. I do cook sometimes and make the porridge every morning and sometimes I eat what he's made but I can't be asked to spend so much time messing about in the kitchen every day. As for complaining about your cooking hmm. Mind you I know that being in pain and lack of sleep can make anyone into a grouch though it doesn't help when you're both in that situation. Hope that things improve soon for you.
ReplyDelete((((hugs))))
ReplyDeleteJ xx