Thankfully, I feel back to normal today, the overwhelming tiredness has gone (just my normal everyday tiredness left!). Which is good, as I have lots to do this week, loads of little jobs I want to get done.
I'm trying to keep occupied at the moment. For some reason, I'm finding it very hard being without my Mum right now, she's in my thoughts a lot and I so miss having her to talk to on the end of the phone. I don't know why this year is harder than last (she died on Christmas Eve the year before last), but it is. I'm not looking forward to Christmas at all really, I'm now even feeling ambivalent about decorating the new Christmas tree. My Mum was a no-nonsense, plain speaking woman.....she could sometimes make my eyebrows rise at some of the things she said (she had no filter, especially as she got older), but she was very good at dispensing advice when I needed it, she was very wise and often knew just the right thing to say. I miss her so much.
Right now it feels like everyone I looked up to and turned to for advice and just a listening ear and strong pair of arms, is disappearing from my life.
Right, must get on, lots to do.
Just give it time and the joy of Christmas will come. it would be such a shame not to go through with putting your tree up, you spent a lot of thought and pleasure on it already. I don't know whether your Mum enjoyed Christmas but she would have wanted for you to enjoy it so why not dedicate your new tree to her love and memory.
ReplyDeleteYou will always miss her, but the pain will ease. As Annabeth says, dedicate the tree to her and enjoy it. There are 2 listening ears here, if you need them. Not the same I know, but the offer is there. Sending you a virtual hug. xx
ReplyDeleteThis time of year is always so hard when loved ones are no longer here. There are so many shared memories and experiences.
ReplyDeleteSending loads of love - I do understand.
xx
Mother died age 60 1992. Her birthday is Dec 24
ReplyDeleteMy life changed when she died
180
I miss her daily
It took a few years before I did a tree…about five…then with grandchildren arriving I did The Whole house.my three grand girls loved it…
Now in the co ndo a small tree and minimal also but I am glad I do. The two little grandsons won’t have the memories of my house and all the Christmas.
It is a tribute to my mother…to Christmas and my family…look at the ornaments and enjoy…start,asking them and do your own traditions…you do have others to lean on…us…
Ignore the typing errors…phone on last leg
ReplyDeleteI think the second year is always harder. As we are losing our older generation of the family we have suddenly become the ones everyone goes to for advice.
ReplyDeleteGrief hits at different times. (((Hugs)))
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
Take a minute and remember what WOULD your mom have told you to do about what is bothering you. You know what she'd say...so think of her and take her advice. Thank goodness she isn't going through the covid times we are. It has been hard but we are coping. Finding new skills.Making you stronger. You are stronger than you think and that you thought you were. You have dealt with some whoppers....know your mom is in you and you know what she would tell you. Think of her with love and affection and heed her advice. Sis you are a strong woman. You are dealing you are coping. I am proud of you and hope to be as strong as you if need be.
ReplyDeleteThank you B, that's so kind of you x
DeleteThank you everyone for your lovely comments and support, it's appreciated very very much. xx
ReplyDelete