Friday, 17 March 2023

An unexploded bomb

 I do wish they'd hurry up and give husband this memory assessment and brain scan appointment, I know they said it would be within 6 weeks and it's only been 10 days so far, but when you're waiting to see if your world is going to be shattered, it's a bloody agony waiting.  And yes I know (we both do) that it could be something fairly innocuous, but it's human nature to worry.  We've only told a very small handful of family and friends about the memory problems and referral so far, so as not to worry anyone else unnecessarily, but it does feel like we're sitting on an unexploded bomb.  Thank you all so much for your support, I do appreciate it enormously.  I need a great big hug and reassurance right now, very disturbed sleep is making me feel very anxious.  And of course night time thoughts are the worst.

We're off to the caravan for the day, there's some sun forecast in between the showers.  If we wait for a good sunny, warm, rain-free day, we'll be waiting forever.  Hopefully, some more of the Spring bulbs I planted last year should be flowering, and there might be a few more owners there, which would be good.  It would be nice if the site owner had managed to cut the grass, but I won't be surprised if he hasn't.  Speaking of which, our home lawn needs its first cut too, it's quite high in places and looks decidedly scruffy.  When it hasn't been raining it's been too cold for husband to do it (very cold weather makes him breathless and hurts his chest), and when it's warmer (like now) it's either raining or has been and the grass is too wet.  Using the mower hurts my back and hip and thoroughly wears me out, but I may have to bite the bullet and do it if husband can't.

I didn't make meatballs with the chicken mince yesterday, there were a couple of red peppers in the fridge that needed using.  I lightly fried the mince with chopped onion, mixed it with a pack of brown and wild rice, a splash of cream and some grated cheese, sage and paprika and used that to stuff the peppers, which I'd cut in half as they were large ones.  I air fried two halves, they cooked beautifully, we had them with green veggies.  The other two halves we'll have tonight with the leftover veggies, saves me having to cook when we get in from the caravan.  There was enough of the chicken and rice mixture left to freeze as well for another meal.

I really fancy a bit of chocolate right now, sure sign that I'm feeling stressed, I'm not a chocoholic at all, preferring savoury things.


  1. Yes, Sooze, waiting for tests and results of tests is awful. I'm not surprised you're not sleeping well and are feeling stressed. I always fear the worst, I think most people do. Sending a big hug your way!
    I'm hoping the weather holds out today. My grass needs cutting and I started clearing one of the beds (full of couch grass among the plants - they're all going in the green bin!) a couple of weeks ago when the weather was mild. Since then, it's been cold, snowy, frosty, wet and windy. Oh, I do hate the cold!
    I hope you have a lovely day at the caravan. Hopefully there'll be some people there to chat to, but if not, just admire all the hard work you've both done! xx

  2. I am SO sorry that you're having to go through these hard times! And no sleep, to boot... Just try to stay busy while waiting for the results...I know it's hard...
    Sending you that Big Hug!!

  3. Sooze you poor love. Waiting for that kind of news must be dreadful. I do hope it isn't as bad as you are imagining it to be. Sending you gentle hugs. Xx

  4. So sorry that things are not moving quickly. One would think they could give you a date for the tests at least.

    Hope you enjoyed the trip to the caravan today.

    God bless.


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